You leave the safe and often ramen-scented bubble that is college life, and not seeing your friends every second of every day feels like having a rug pulled out from under you. You still text and call your girls constantly, but you slowly come to the realization that you can never go back to a time when your biggest worry was choosing your costumes for some themed keg party.
Meanwhile, sometimes it feels like you’re enjoying your newfound adulthood by dating as many men as humanly possible. Essentially, you’re figuring out what you don’t want in a mate and then discussing said findings with your girls over cocktails as you guys giggle, compare hilarious texts, and swap stories of men behaving badly. As the revolving door to your studio apartment continues to welcome fresh faces, your girlfriends and their familiar inside jokes are the constants in your life. How Friendship Changes in Your twenties, thirties, and fourties
As you float from dude to dude, your career goals are also coming into focus. According to Reuters, one survey found that as many as 80 percent of people in their twenties feel they are not in the right career, and your girlfriends are helping you come to that realization for yourself as they commiserate with you about their own condescending bosses and crappy work days. Your friends are just as broke as you, and, unlike your parents, they won’t judge the fact that you had cereal for dinner twice last week. How Friendship Changes in Your twenties, thirties, and fourties
By your late twenties, wild, short-skirted clubbing nights will gradually become memories reserved for the annals of your Facebook photo albums. Instead of escaping for girls’ trips to Cabo, you begin to spend most of your “fun time” standing up in one another’s weddings.
You still have the occasional crazy night—but it’s usually at one of your friend’s places because the thought of spending even 15 minutes in a loud, crowded bar sounds like a fate worse than hell. Plus, at least one of you has gotten really into artisanal cheeses, and partying at home gives you the chance to indulge in them.
You’ve finally mastered the art of paying your rent and bills, and this brings you all a level of confidence that infiltrates virtually every aspect of your lives (exhibits A and B: You ask for that raise, and you realize you absolutely can rock red lipstick). Coming into financial security also means that when you take girls’ trips out of town, you’re no longer sleeping seven to a room, and you totally splurge on massages.
The surreal nature of seeing your friends become moms begins to fade, and “I can’t, I’m breast feeding” becomes the new “I can’t, I’m too hungover.” You no longer seek advice from your pals on whether you should get a tattoo and instead begin to compare interest rates on mortgages.
Your metabolism has definitely slowed, but luckily, your friends are in the same boat, so you always have someone to drink cold-pressed juice or go to that trendy barre class with.
You’ve settled into family life and love your kids and husband, but you don’t know what you’d do if you didn’t have girlfriends to vent to about the fact that your 4-year-old insists on turning “Please put on some pants” into a full-blown protest. You’re so busy with work and family that time with your girlfriends is a luxury you savor, but when you do see each other, you make it count—whether it’s by spending an indulgent day at the spa or a having a dinner where you stay at the table catching up long after the check has been paid.